Praise for Kevin Coval and L-vis Lives! -- schtick: an arse poetica -- ℵ aleph ℵ -- kike -- trans(atlantic)lation -- chosen -- mezuzah -- midrash of the body -- semite -- ben ℵ -- the family business -- the singer of songs -- on becoming a man -- schtick (at eric's bar mitzvah) -- the speech i should've written OR, the poem i said i would write for his 22nd bornday OR, something for my brother at 32 -- At the Passover Seder -- ode to the gefilte fish -- hamotzi on thanksgiving -- Rosh Hashanah in the Suburbs OR, in the assimilated diaspora, it is still the new year! OR, my brother cuts an apple, Shana Tova! -- writing -- assimilation & its dis/contents -- treif -- why jews celebrate christmas -- a christmas tale writes itself -- no juden -- Explaining Hanukkah -- how jewish boys get irish names -- allegory of the jewish boy served pork at his friend's restaurant -- an american parody: in parts -- un/doing the pyramids -- making it, more or less -- punch line -- remembering baby: an american parody (in parts) -- Warhol Nose America -- No Nose Job OR, How Humpty Put Me Back Together Again -- see, for me, the bigger the nose the better -- ode to the schnozz -- Babs in Babylon -- shiksas -- shiksas -- the merchant, the shiksa, and the american dream: the tropes of Debbie Does Dallas -- boxer -- assimilation nightmare #1 -- assimilation nightmare #2 -- inheritance -- the find -- George -- George speaks -- passdown -- midrash -- schtick -- Don Rickles Roasts Ronald Reagan -- loaded -- allen ginsberg gets expelled from columbia university for writing fuck the jews in dust on the windowsill of his dormitory -- Dirty Names for Monica Lewinsky -- Mean Woman -- Nothing Sacred: Ode to Lenny Bruce -- Midrash of Roseanne Singing the National Anthem -- WWLBD -- tuesdays with mel gibson -- old testament one-liner (a חי coup) -- passion of the kike -- nazi pope.

henry ford wraps hitler's birthday present -- strange bedfellows: for american jews who no longer hyphenate their identity, vote republican, and think christians are down for the maintenance of our people -- Derrick Asks to See My Horns -- on the charge of deicide -- The Centurion Classic -- deicide -- the secret relationship between Blacks & jews -- The Indefensible Al Jolson -- on how jews became white -- the white dream of irving berlin -- blonde ambition -- portrait with midrash of israel's favorite rapper -- Avraham the Patriarch Was Black -- The Break (Ocean Hill-Brownsville 1968) -- Public Enemy #1 -- Louis Farrakhan Plays Felix Mendelssohn -- the secret relationship between Blacks and jews -- jewtown -- Don Rickles Roasts Sammy Davis Jr. -- talisman -- the holocaust calls for its orthonym -- 48-hour ars poetica -- all the pharoahs must fall -- self-hating jew™ -- what it's like to be the disagreeable grandson of zionists -- why i stopped going to shul -- explaining myself -- Reflection on the Israeli Army Shutting Down the Palestine Festival of Literature in the Month of May in 2009: Burning Books, a Bebelplatz in Jerusalem -- portrait of a slumlord -- Now's the Time to Be Fresh -- shiksa angel -- all the pharaohs must fall -- what will i tell my jewish kids -- post-schtick -- post-schtick -- Acknowledgments -- About the Author.