Contents -- A Convention of Offenses -- My Days at Sea -- Our Tigers -- Journal for Baudelaire -- New Country -- On Sports -- Society for the Dissolution of Learning -- Rimbaud's Ears -- Power -- Spring -- What to Wear for Divorce -- Closet of Desserts -- Less-than-Stylish Ennui -- My Genuine Correspondence with Lord Byron -- True Story -- Two Things That Didn't Happen to Me -- How Things Work -- Color Film -- My Conference with Guillaume Apollinaire -- Someday I'll Take Again My Lightning Drive through Love -- Jazz -- Pup -- Annulment -- Bee -- To Percy Bysshe Shelley -- Disabled Power Steering -- Inadequacy -- High-Rise -- Planet of Distraction -- Lift -- Fence -- The Candidates -- Temp -- Once -- My Boyfriend: A Confession -- Nurse Kiki on WCW -- Singles -- Bob's Our Uncle -- Balm -- The Band -- Someone Is Messing Up the Roses -- Our Lodger -- Boathouse -- Why I Should Be a Concierge -- That Was Me -- Difficult Daughters -- How Need Makes Beauty -- The Dress with Books on It Is Too Small -- My Mettle -- Big Colt -- Good Night, Mr. Know-It-All -- For Larry Rivers -- Piecework -- My Background -- My Audition -- Bone -- Phoning Frank O'Hara -- O Apollinaire, O Quai d'Orsay, O Luxembourg -- Provisions -- Notes -- Acknowledgments.