Cover -- Title Page -- Copyright Page -- Dedication -- Contents -- Lithe Brunette, Twenty-Five Years of Age -- Dark, Understated Romantic Comedies -- Of Me to Love -- Choose Stutter Brie -- I Too Am Gay -- The Matinee I Took Chicken In -- Occupy Street -- One of These Girls -- Everything Is Going To -- Grandmother Snuff -- Granddaddy Old Grand Dad -- Wife Wellbutrin -- Father Work -- Mistress Damage -- Choirboy Skittles -- Cousin Pot -- Friend's Girlfriend Kools -- Sister Chablis -- Mother Old Fashioned -- Brother Oxycontin -- New Oil Today's Men -- Stop Me Before -- Fichte -- Porcupine Fever Is Gonna Get You -- Faggot Said the Guy in the Truck -- Wished for Hater Sequel -- Lotto Blues -- I Will Not Be Expressed -- Welcome Music -- If There Be a Season -- Big Red Booster -- All You Can -- Forever Backpacker -- The Great-Uncle Dead -- No Key to This One, No Tune -- How to Get to April Blue -- Roof Garden Heritage Site -- Auto-Brightness -- Buffalo Nickel, Toothbrush, Crude -- New Make -- Hopscotch Smudges -- Game Show Theme Mix -- Words by Karl Marx, Tuxedo by Riot -- The Barn Party -- Gonna Dig Up Ozu -- Bars and Lounges on Yelp -- Hard Drive Scrub -- Across the Boss's Desk -- Purple Snow Purple Snow -- Black Steel -- Songs for a Country Drive.