Contents -- Acknowledgments -- Introduction: On Occasion -- Part One: Physics -- The Sokal Hoax for Beginners -- The Return of Realism and the Future of Contingency -- Of Fine Clothes and Naked Emperors -- The Utility of the Arts and Humanities -- Part Two: Positions -- There Is Nothing inside the Text -- or, Why No One's Heard of Wolfgang Iser -- Citizens of the World, Unite: Martha Nussbaum's Plan for Cultivating Humanity -- American Studies without Exceptions -- Idolatries of the Marketplace: Thomas Frank, Cultural Studies, and the Voice of the People -- Part Three: Professions -- Days of Future Past -- Teaching to the Six -- Working for the U: On the Rhetoric of "Affiliation" -- Dream a Little Dream -- Professing and Parenting -- Speaking of Speakers -- Universities Should Be Open for Business -- Analyze, Don't Summarize -- The Top 10 Contradictory Things about Popular Culture -- The Elvis Costello Problem -- Part Four: Politics -- The Lefts before 11 September -- Nation and Narration -- Can the Left Get Iraq Right? -- For a Better-and Broader-Antiwar Movement -- Fighting Liberals -- The Loyalties of American Studies -- Part Five: Posts -- Azkaban Blogging -- Back in Les États-Unis -- Vacation Reading II -- Republican National Convention, Second Night -- More Plans for Democrats in Distress -- The Beinart Effect -- Theory Tuesday II -- Theory Tuesday III -- Was I Ever Wrong -- Index -- A -- B -- C -- D -- E -- F -- G -- H -- I -- J -- K -- L -- M -- N -- O -- P -- Q -- R -- S -- T -- U -- V -- W -- Y -- Z.